What do you do?

[Old Forums]

Well.. I've been sat here for 2 nights in a row now.. crying my eyes out.

One of my best friends who moved over to the States killed herself 2 nights ago...and I don't know what to think. She had no reason to whatsoever, and we're all at a loss except for her father.. who has the note.

This would be the second person close to me that I've lost this year, although this time it's different.

I've felt like 2 different people entirely - during the day I'm happy and normal.. at night I can't sleep and sit curled up in my room feeling like crap.

She committed suicide..which has just made me realise what it would have felt like had I managed to kill myself. It seems like such a selfish thing to do, hurting everyone around you so badly. Her dads stuck in hospital after having a heart attack, and frankly is a total wreck.

I suppose I'm posting all this to get it off my chest and ask what I should do.. because I'm just so god damn confused.

[Old Forums]

Sorry to hear that m8, been there myself and its not a nice place to be.
It's good that you are posting this as you do need to get it off your chest. All you can really do is try to be strong and help those that need helping, and when you need help just come back here and we'll be the help you need.
I know this has shown you that suicide is not the way, with the knock on effect this has had, and the world of hurt left behind.

[Old Forums]

aye sorry to hear that m8......

[Old Forums]

It sounds like your normal, the night always has a different effect on people. It multiplies things, makes emotions more powerful. I always feel that waiting for the daylight to make decision, a more wiser way of thinking.

Suicide is a very selfish thing, an event that finish one life but can affect so many around you. Even when your not there it will effect others for many years.

With the crying at least you venting it, and talking is good. Your friend ended their life, which was a real waste. I aways feel that things like that make me value life more. Try and think of the better times and learn from it. For then even a short exsistance has been a benifit to those around them, something to learn from.

Ive had quite a few close death's around me, and the first one was hard for i was young, i tried to deny it but it just comes back
and bites you on the arse when your least expecting it. so try and keep your chin up. And I dont think that your friend would like to see you so sad.

[Old Forums]

wise words from Smee there......

[Old Forums]

im really sorry to hear that Red.

I hope youre not racking your brains tying to figure out wether you could have prevented it from happening because you will drive yourself loco. The whole situation is/was completely out of your control.

It sounds lame but try to remember the things you loved about your friend. Her life hasnt been wasted because it has touched your life, and probably many more.

I dont know if you're suggesting that there could be something sinister about your friends death (ie not suicide).

I agree with Smee that night time always intensifys everything. Try to keep yourself as busy as possible, i find writing my thoughts down always helps when i get down. U can then re-read them later. i also find that sometimes crying can be comforting so let it all out. if you have a good friend who can just hold you while ure crying and while youre feeling all fecked and confused, it can really help.

I suggest you just let your friends dad know that if he needs you for anything, you'll be there (im guessing youd want to help any way u can), but it still might be too much right now.

My thoughts are with you Red...chin up geezer

[Old Forums]

Hmmm sorry to hear aboiut that mate. Im not vry good at this kinda thing ut if you need to talk or any thing then here (oooo the cheezyness)

[Old Forums]

dude, i always found writing songs helps, im ****, but its a good way to get feelings out and as buch said, if ya need to moan at anyone go to him :p nah jk im here for ya bud

[Old Forums]

i have been in the same **** to... its something that will haunt you. This may sound like balls for many but i try to remember that person for who he/she was before the suicide. All the good moments and try to remember them for the good things they braught to my life. And not trying to condem them for being selfish.. even if the act it self is very selfish it issent the way you want to remember that person. umm i think im wayy off now so i think ill stop typing.. ill be on msn m8 if ya wanna talk just give me a beep and ill talk with ya

[Old Forums]

yeah sorry to hear that dragon.. but life goes on
A girl i know well try to overdose on pills and cut her wrists but she lived trough it.
Maybe shes happy know or maybe she isnt.. we will never know what goes on in peoples minds.
But as i said life goes on... its a challenge... bad and good things happen in it .. and try to remerber those people in there good moments..

Regards and condelences (or something like that) from curry

[Old Forums]

All good sound advice in its own way Rd ...however everyone here are all trying to help however don't necessarily have the skills..I suggest you speak to someone...if things are getting really bad...However wot you have to remember is that all the things you are feeling are perfectly natural.first the disbelief adn non accpetance..then anger and frustration directed at the person themselves or others around including ypurself..then will come hopelessness and grief..and finally you will accept it ..won't make the hurt go away or the times you will think about it adn cry but it will ease...again like others been there done that ..but also know a little bit about counselling me and Blues Job so ...you know where I am if you wanna word m8. I can't give you any solutions can only be here to help you along the path that only you can travel..hope this makes a little sense...

my initial point sorry was if you find things are so bad you can't sleep and are finding it hard to concentrate on things then thats the time to speak to a professional it don't mean your mad ...it just means you need a little help just now...I have also been there and it was the best thing I ever did...

[Old Forums]

Sorry to hear about your loss matey. Can only reiterate what killsy said but from a personal perspective time is a great healer.
Know that means feck all to you just now mate but I can assure you it is true.